So how do i start?
let's go straight first. i will be part of the unemployed market by September 9, 2011.
yes, i just lost my job this morning.
well management tells us that our department, the one that i'm working at for more than 5 years is being retrenched and it's part of the "changes in the wind" situation right now.
it was announced yesterday during our general assembly by our president.
anyway, so there you go. i'll be jobless in a month.
basically i just need to finish my remaining works and turnover it by the end of the month.
and somehow, even we all know that the war is ending, we'll still going to fight for it. no matter what. we leave HRO with our faces looking up and proud.
it just saddens me that more 5 years here. i've grown and learned a lot.
so today. it's not a good day for all of us here at work.
Showing posts with label sighs. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sighs. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Friday, April 23, 2010
Christ, what an asshole.
How can you enjoy a game (let's say DOTA or L4D) w/ your friends if your friends don't want you to join?
Whatever happened to having fun and supporting one another... you know, friendship?
I guess it says about being into groups or packs... like wolves or something. There will come a time that your so-called "friends" will stab you at the back and just leave you dead.
So far, it's the thing that is running in my head with some or most people here at work.
And somehow it's the reason why I'm planning to leave soon. To avoid any connections with them. They're such assholes. Seriously, even some people whom I trust a lot.
Anyway, I can still stay calm and keep it all to myself, or just releasing it through this blog.
And if ever I join them they'll mock me on why I "walked-out" before... sighs! how shallow can they get? Assholes!
Oh well, somehow, I still really feeling bad about it. But somehow, still can be subtle about it.... for now.
Now I really feel angry to all of them! Fuck them all!! I hope they all die!! (I know I sound like brat, but I'm starting to get angry while typing this blog... grrrr... I just really that angry towards them... all focused, enjoying and laughing there in the other room. sighs!)
Sometimes I just want to report them so that they deserve it, but I can't.
They're still my friends. Friends to tend to be assholes.
Anyway, I'm still angry at them and the one whom I considered close mocks me more... gaaaah!!
I'm still pissed!
grrrr...
Whatever happened to having fun and supporting one another... you know, friendship?
I guess it says about being into groups or packs... like wolves or something. There will come a time that your so-called "friends" will stab you at the back and just leave you dead.
So far, it's the thing that is running in my head with some or most people here at work.
And somehow it's the reason why I'm planning to leave soon. To avoid any connections with them. They're such assholes. Seriously, even some people whom I trust a lot.
Anyway, I can still stay calm and keep it all to myself, or just releasing it through this blog.
And if ever I join them they'll mock me on why I "walked-out" before... sighs! how shallow can they get? Assholes!
Oh well, somehow, I still really feeling bad about it. But somehow, still can be subtle about it.... for now.
Now I really feel angry to all of them! Fuck them all!! I hope they all die!! (I know I sound like brat, but I'm starting to get angry while typing this blog... grrrr... I just really that angry towards them... all focused, enjoying and laughing there in the other room. sighs!)
Sometimes I just want to report them so that they deserve it, but I can't.
They're still my friends. Friends to tend to be assholes.
Anyway, I'm still angry at them and the one whom I considered close mocks me more... gaaaah!!
I'm still pissed!
grrrr...
Friday, March 19, 2010
hush
okay, I'm back on blogging.
well, i'm not quite sure yet if i'll be regular on blogging stuff again... but hey, there's no harm in taking this avenue again...
so what now?
i guess i just have to put this on this entry since i need to put something... right?
so let's start with Black Bolt...
yes, "Black Bolt".... that's the name that i'll be using to a specific person that I want to ran over with my car back and forth. and later swing a bat at "Black Bolt"'s face until it's like smashed watermelon.
anyway, see how i want to release all the stress at "BB"... hahaha yeah, "Black Bolt" is quite long, than "BB"... hhahaha
if ever someone i know reads this blog (which i doubt), will surely laugh to see this pic... hahaha
hmm... does someone i know (aside from my best friend) got the chance to read my blogs? hmmm.... i'm quite curious about it... but somehow i don't care too... hahaha
anyway, sometimes i would like some of my other friends see this blog too... well just this entry... hahaha
now, i'm quite getting bored to type more stuff... 'cause i think i got nothing to type anymore... hahaha
oh well, i guess i'll still with "BB" for this entry... and later give more details why i hate "BB" more everyday... hehehe
Sunday, February 21, 2010
why oh why... tsk tsk
hmm... the students haven't started to text me.
this is bad. really, REALLY BAD.
Bad in a sense that we can't do time-travel and make it all work right. I know there's a solution on this one, get the list of the 10 and call them to remind them. But I have other priorities to do, but I guess I should try to juggle things out and fix it.
Fix it. That's 2 words that somehow I'm not good at all. But let's see if I can fix this... w/o the help or assistance of others. It's my mess after all, right?
But still, after all this is done, I'm still going to kill Pong Aguila on this one. hahaha. No worries Pong, we're still good friends, but I'm really going to kill you for this one. :P
Oh well, it's almost 9pm, I need to heat the water, I'll be leaving at around 10pm.
later.
this is bad. really, REALLY BAD.
Bad in a sense that we can't do time-travel and make it all work right. I know there's a solution on this one, get the list of the 10 and call them to remind them. But I have other priorities to do, but I guess I should try to juggle things out and fix it.
Fix it. That's 2 words that somehow I'm not good at all. But let's see if I can fix this... w/o the help or assistance of others. It's my mess after all, right?
But still, after all this is done, I'm still going to kill Pong Aguila on this one. hahaha. No worries Pong, we're still good friends, but I'm really going to kill you for this one. :P
Oh well, it's almost 9pm, I need to heat the water, I'll be leaving at around 10pm.
later.
Sunday, February 07, 2010
It's the climb.... oh yeah.
I feel like each day that comes, i want to just break the window in front of my table at work and just jump do a free fall.
... but then again, I hate a goowy-messy death.
Anyway, it's Sunday and somehow I still want another day to just lay down on my bed, try to catch-up on what I 've missed in the tube. Just be a regular home-buddy.
I wish that things at work would fall on the right places. And basing on what I'm seeing it's being chaotic in a sense of order. And it making my 'resignation-bucket' more heavier.
... and there's It's Academic. I have a lot against it and that somehow, I'm still doing the task. Sometimes I hate my attitudes that I tend to say 'yes' even if I explained why I said 'no' on the first place.
Thus I'm going to kill Pong Aguila on this one. Well one thing, our friendship is just based on work-laughs and that I tend to avoid hanging out with him. He's quite close-minded. Even his opinions and perspective of stuff, I don't like it. But hey, everyone has the right to express their thoughts.
... it's that my thoughts/opinions don't mesh-up with his, 'cause his way of thinking is too old and mine is a little bit complicated and updated. Plainly, I just hate-HATE him. Good thing he's a few meters away from my desk this time. I guess that's good for me.
... But that It's Academic, it will really cause him his life. I'll really kill him for passing it on to me halfway of his project. DAMMIT.
Oh, well. I guess this week I'll be exercising more brain cells on work. I'll try to make a 'Dark Phoenix' manifestation at work, if I can. Last week with the smiling at the meeting w/ JBW made me feel good.
Hmm... I guess i should try smiling again.
Anyway, got to prep-up for tomorrow. 4 Field works this week. Will be trying to get people to my office for our clients needs.
Oh it's going to be one of those weeks again, and this time I think I'll be having just a one-person support all the way. Thanks to AM & JBW for ruining everything.
Anyway, I'm currently emailing my resume to some notable companies just trying to check if I'm sellable to the HR market.
Wish me luck this week.
Laterz.
... but then again, I hate a goowy-messy death.
Anyway, it's Sunday and somehow I still want another day to just lay down on my bed, try to catch-up on what I 've missed in the tube. Just be a regular home-buddy.
I wish that things at work would fall on the right places. And basing on what I'm seeing it's being chaotic in a sense of order. And it making my 'resignation-bucket' more heavier.
... and there's It's Academic. I have a lot against it and that somehow, I'm still doing the task. Sometimes I hate my attitudes that I tend to say 'yes' even if I explained why I said 'no' on the first place.
Thus I'm going to kill Pong Aguila on this one. Well one thing, our friendship is just based on work-laughs and that I tend to avoid hanging out with him. He's quite close-minded. Even his opinions and perspective of stuff, I don't like it. But hey, everyone has the right to express their thoughts.
... it's that my thoughts/opinions don't mesh-up with his, 'cause his way of thinking is too old and mine is a little bit complicated and updated. Plainly, I just hate-HATE him. Good thing he's a few meters away from my desk this time. I guess that's good for me.
... But that It's Academic, it will really cause him his life. I'll really kill him for passing it on to me halfway of his project. DAMMIT.
Oh, well. I guess this week I'll be exercising more brain cells on work. I'll try to make a 'Dark Phoenix' manifestation at work, if I can. Last week with the smiling at the meeting w/ JBW made me feel good.
Hmm... I guess i should try smiling again.
Anyway, got to prep-up for tomorrow. 4 Field works this week. Will be trying to get people to my office for our clients needs.
Oh it's going to be one of those weeks again, and this time I think I'll be having just a one-person support all the way. Thanks to AM & JBW for ruining everything.
Anyway, I'm currently emailing my resume to some notable companies just trying to check if I'm sellable to the HR market.
Wish me luck this week.
Laterz.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
loosing it again...
i guess it's another re-run of a quite depressing episode for me.
right now i can't think straight.
like i know what i will do and somehow it's organized but i just don't have the drive right now to work... like all my strength to go and work just wore off out of a sudden.
well not really out of a sudden... i was just demotivated by a lot of stuff lately.
w/c is making me hard to cope up.
to be honest, i know (really know) what to do... BUT i just don't have the motivation anymore to do it as of the moment.
people may see it that i might be avoiding the work task but it's not that.
just too many things in my head and somehow, i'm just standing there and doing nothing... like a catatonic state... but i'm aware of the things that are happening, i'm just not moving to doing some actions.
...ok, burn-out is at it again.
i give up. i'm tired of this so-called day job. it's not helping me at all to cope up. in fact it's more on pulling me down, morally.
i. give. up.
right now i can't think straight.
like i know what i will do and somehow it's organized but i just don't have the drive right now to work... like all my strength to go and work just wore off out of a sudden.
well not really out of a sudden... i was just demotivated by a lot of stuff lately.
w/c is making me hard to cope up.
to be honest, i know (really know) what to do... BUT i just don't have the motivation anymore to do it as of the moment.
people may see it that i might be avoiding the work task but it's not that.
just too many things in my head and somehow, i'm just standing there and doing nothing... like a catatonic state... but i'm aware of the things that are happening, i'm just not moving to doing some actions.
...ok, burn-out is at it again.
i give up. i'm tired of this so-called day job. it's not helping me at all to cope up. in fact it's more on pulling me down, morally.
i. give. up.
Tuesday, September 08, 2009
dude... ano ba?
what the heck is wrong with you?
will it be like this always?
like we don't always know each other?
and somewhat you will always have that look on that I'm nobody you know... sighs.
this is tiring and bullshit!
i know i that i did something wrong, but i don't know what it is... and somehow you already made that face on me so please tell me.
and let's talk. i know you are also concern to your friends. but you seldom say it and you always (ALWAYS) approach me in an offensive way that i no longer understand.
so please, i wanna talk things out... I may sound like a girl but hey! I'm your friend too... and I considered you as a very close friend.
will it be like this always?
like we don't always know each other?
and somewhat you will always have that look on that I'm nobody you know... sighs.
this is tiring and bullshit!
i know i that i did something wrong, but i don't know what it is... and somehow you already made that face on me so please tell me.
and let's talk. i know you are also concern to your friends. but you seldom say it and you always (ALWAYS) approach me in an offensive way that i no longer understand.
so please, i wanna talk things out... I may sound like a girl but hey! I'm your friend too... and I considered you as a very close friend.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
hug-deprived
ok... i'm tired from today's work... and it's just wednesday!
i need a hug... badly.
can someone hug me. i just need that short-term comfort that can last for the rest of the week.
hug me.
i need a hug... badly.
can someone hug me. i just need that short-term comfort that can last for the rest of the week.
hug me.
Friday, May 29, 2009
crazy friday...
what's my job description again?
i guess in my line of work right now... the "job description" is just some food color or icing on a very large cake of styro-foam.
oh well... just came from a department meeting, which I can say one of the few boring meetings again. somehow, I try to "include" myself in the meeting, but somehow, i tend to just play some songs in my head.
yes, it's that boring... haha
anyway, i'll be staying here at the office 'til 8pm... 'cause my schedule today was an adjustment, due to the tire fixing this morning.
anyway, I'll just pretend to do something productive in the last few minutes of my work time, and maybe later I'll just play some PC games or just go home and sleep for tomorrow I need to be early to some school at Makati.
oh well, that's the day... Friday for me right now... hahaha something crazy again.
oh I miss doing my other field work... somehow. yeah, somewhat I miss doing the speech and aiming it directly to it or them... hahaha... fun and also worth it, not what I'm doing in my "day job".
anyway... I miss a lot of stuff right now. and now my mind is giving a lot of random thoughts... I guess I better stop it for now...
laterz...
i guess in my line of work right now... the "job description" is just some food color or icing on a very large cake of styro-foam.
oh well... just came from a department meeting, which I can say one of the few boring meetings again. somehow, I try to "include" myself in the meeting, but somehow, i tend to just play some songs in my head.
yes, it's that boring... haha
anyway, i'll be staying here at the office 'til 8pm... 'cause my schedule today was an adjustment, due to the tire fixing this morning.
anyway, I'll just pretend to do something productive in the last few minutes of my work time, and maybe later I'll just play some PC games or just go home and sleep for tomorrow I need to be early to some school at Makati.
oh well, that's the day... Friday for me right now... hahaha something crazy again.
oh I miss doing my other field work... somehow. yeah, somewhat I miss doing the speech and aiming it directly to it or them... hahaha... fun and also worth it, not what I'm doing in my "day job".
anyway... I miss a lot of stuff right now. and now my mind is giving a lot of random thoughts... I guess I better stop it for now...
laterz...
Monday, May 04, 2009
burning responsibility...
(click photo to enlarge)
ok ok... i can say that i'm a responsible person. but the comic-strip above says about the current project that i'm handling here at work. so for those who are familiar to my line of work and the current project i'm handling... the strip is like what i'm in with HRO-C classes.
i may be acting like i'm used to it or getting the hang of it... but this responsibility BURNS!!!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
my thoughts as of the present...
- I know it's not my business, but somehow i wanna ask "what's wrong?" and "are you guys ok?" but i don't want to sound like I'm prying on it. I'm just really concern to the both of you, 'cause both of you are really close to me and I don't want to see you both in an awkward situation. I love you guys!!
- I know you are tired from your holiday tour. but somehow do you really have to ignore me? I know you're tired and all. But every time!!! you really tend to give the shortest of short answers. you're like one of those applicants i interview that would not expound or go into some small details. they just give a one word answer. thus me failing them for not able to express themselves well enough. please i know you, and you're not like those people i interview. you're my closest friend. but sometimes, really sometimes, i feel like I'm nothing to you. and I'm hoping that feeling is not true.
- I'm not energized to do work anymore. and i don't know why. i want to grow more and learn more. but sometimes i just want to just stay in one area. and be annoying. and it's starting to annoy me that I'm becoming annoying at my line of work. what should i do?
... there some thoughts that have been running in my head lately.
no pun intended to some people that I'm referring at in this blog entry.
- I know you are tired from your holiday tour. but somehow do you really have to ignore me? I know you're tired and all. But every time!!! you really tend to give the shortest of short answers. you're like one of those applicants i interview that would not expound or go into some small details. they just give a one word answer. thus me failing them for not able to express themselves well enough. please i know you, and you're not like those people i interview. you're my closest friend. but sometimes, really sometimes, i feel like I'm nothing to you. and I'm hoping that feeling is not true.
- I'm not energized to do work anymore. and i don't know why. i want to grow more and learn more. but sometimes i just want to just stay in one area. and be annoying. and it's starting to annoy me that I'm becoming annoying at my line of work. what should i do?
... there some thoughts that have been running in my head lately.
no pun intended to some people that I'm referring at in this blog entry.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
mad again
yes. i'm mad at this friend again for a stupid thing he did. i just can't stand what he did kanina at work and meddling with my personal stuff.
i know i have every right to be mad at him... and it really ruined my day's plan.
sighs!!!
i may join you on some crazy stuff but please, ilagay mo rin minsan sa lugar!! nakaka-bad trip ka talaga!
right now i'm deciding to not to see this friend for now... "see" in a sense never speaking to him, ignore his presence and just try to be civil at him when it's work related. if it's not work related forget it for now. again i'm really mad at him. and it may take more than 5 days to not really "see" him.
i've said my piece awhile ago by texting how i felt on the thing that happened.
i'm really REALLY mad at him!!!
i know i have every right to be mad at him... and it really ruined my day's plan.
sighs!!!
i may join you on some crazy stuff but please, ilagay mo rin minsan sa lugar!! nakaka-bad trip ka talaga!
right now i'm deciding to not to see this friend for now... "see" in a sense never speaking to him, ignore his presence and just try to be civil at him when it's work related. if it's not work related forget it for now. again i'm really mad at him. and it may take more than 5 days to not really "see" him.
i've said my piece awhile ago by texting how i felt on the thing that happened.
i'm really REALLY mad at him!!!
Friday, March 27, 2009
huhu-hihi-hehe's work rant stuff...
it's been a while since i last blogged in... well like a month ago.
anyway, so far some things has changed. i'm handling an pseudo-account here at work. i'm handling training classes for people with a low possibility of getting hired, so yeah, basically i'm handling "charity" training. but somehow, it made my "work-groove" back. 'cause last months activity with colleges & universities was not really my idea of work.
yeah, i was a 2nd lead on the school projects. which i didn't really liked joining in the first place. but i was put in that place for me to experience it... so, i just put it in my "something to learn but won't really use it list". good thing i was able to learn a lot from that activity. not just the actual set-up but also on some people i work with in that certain activity. and so far, i really find it annoying... hahaha
anyway, right now, i'm just finishing some of the things i need to get it done. for tomorrow is the 2nd time our company is conducting a recruitment activity on a night time... and the only thing that worries me is the weather. yup... it must not rain tomorrow until sunday AM.
oh well, i guess i need to pray for the event tomorrow to be a success...
and now, i guess i have shut-down for now... i need my sleep. for tomorrow is the final battle of a week-long war here at work.
wish me luck! c",)
anyway, so far some things has changed. i'm handling an pseudo-account here at work. i'm handling training classes for people with a low possibility of getting hired, so yeah, basically i'm handling "charity" training. but somehow, it made my "work-groove" back. 'cause last months activity with colleges & universities was not really my idea of work.
yeah, i was a 2nd lead on the school projects. which i didn't really liked joining in the first place. but i was put in that place for me to experience it... so, i just put it in my "something to learn but won't really use it list". good thing i was able to learn a lot from that activity. not just the actual set-up but also on some people i work with in that certain activity. and so far, i really find it annoying... hahaha
anyway, right now, i'm just finishing some of the things i need to get it done. for tomorrow is the 2nd time our company is conducting a recruitment activity on a night time... and the only thing that worries me is the weather. yup... it must not rain tomorrow until sunday AM.
oh well, i guess i need to pray for the event tomorrow to be a success...
and now, i guess i have shut-down for now... i need my sleep. for tomorrow is the final battle of a week-long war here at work.
wish me luck! c",)
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
just trying to keep it right...
...and so far, i'm really still mad at my friend. thou, i'm somehow, wanted to make the first move in fixing this. but i think i need to stand more firmly this time.
anyway, i was able to "spit-bucket" to our common friend on my situation, and i think she's right that somehow our friend has a sense of what's going on, and its affected by it. but doesn't know how to act right...
i hope things will be all right. and i'm just hoping for the best for all of us. i really value our friendship. but i think we both need to grow and learn too.
anyway, i, in my case, still need to fix things on myself and again avoid being the "martyr" one... i guess putting a stance for a few days would be good.
i just really hope things will go on for the best...
anyway, just for some laughs... check the comic below. c",)
(click to see the large version)
anyway, i was able to "spit-bucket" to our common friend on my situation, and i think she's right that somehow our friend has a sense of what's going on, and its affected by it. but doesn't know how to act right...
i hope things will be all right. and i'm just hoping for the best for all of us. i really value our friendship. but i think we both need to grow and learn too.
anyway, i, in my case, still need to fix things on myself and again avoid being the "martyr" one... i guess putting a stance for a few days would be good.
i just really hope things will go on for the best...
anyway, just for some laughs... check the comic below. c",)
(click to see the large version)Monday, February 16, 2009
letting go for good.
"Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)"
Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the while
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
*so i guess it's really good riddance... and i think i should let go off it already, 'cause i'm seeing it's not really worth it to fight for it at all. it's not really worth it.
that means i need to go too. leave it all behind and just forget them. not just a person, but everything.
and i guess, as this song says, "...but in the end it's right." maybe it's really for the best to just leave and let the past be still memories to be just posted on walls and never in my mind.
Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the while
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.
I hope you had the time of your life.
*so i guess it's really good riddance... and i think i should let go off it already, 'cause i'm seeing it's not really worth it to fight for it at all. it's not really worth it.
that means i need to go too. leave it all behind and just forget them. not just a person, but everything.
and i guess, as this song says, "...but in the end it's right." maybe it's really for the best to just leave and let the past be still memories to be just posted on walls and never in my mind.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
tuesday blue-starter
it's tuesday morning... i think i'll be late for work again.
i don't have any motivation to work since yesterday...
all i want right now is just sleep here in my room... but i can't.
i just hope i can be home early later.
i don't have any motivation to work since yesterday...
all i want right now is just sleep here in my room... but i can't.
i just hope i can be home early later.
Monday, December 18, 2006
i'm a jerk... so far that's it.
i am a selfish person... i just want to be happy.
even if there are times i would extend my hand just to help someone i care... then just one moment of selfishness, thou it's not actually intended to be a selfish act (again, i just want to be happy) things go crazy... thou i saw my mistake, things, i think, are different after...
thou in my part, i was waaaay too excited and too self-centered to let my 'id' take control of me... but who cares...
...ayaw ko na rin patulan pero, it really makes me guilty sa pagagamali ko... thus making me think deeply... and i hate thinking deep... makes me depress, sad and paranoid... like i thought i felt i was palpitating... heart was beating fast... a feeling that i thought it will never happen again...
